Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
