I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
