I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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