her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
