you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
