It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Randomize
