try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
