I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I look excited, but its just a facade.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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