oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
