No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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