Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Randomize
