I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
