You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
