Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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