But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
