Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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