I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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