umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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