Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
