i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
vagina is talking i cant
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
We need to get me chipped asap
Randomize
