Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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