remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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