I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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