they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
