I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize