8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I can't put those talents on a resume
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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