weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
