We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Randomize
