Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
