this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
