I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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