Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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