If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
