just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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