Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
