It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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