my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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