Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
