She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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