In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
