do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
