I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
