All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
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