if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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