my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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