Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
