The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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