i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
