the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Drunk is a universal language darling
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