He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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